Friday, April 06, 2007
You know it's a good bachelorette party when...
1. You gave all your money to a Finnish stripper named Isabel the night before (or at least you're pretty sure that's where it went)
2. You're still drunk on Gray Goose (upon which, last night, I was slizzing) and Sugarfree Red Bulls that were consumed in gallon quantities just six short hours before
3. You went to bed at 5 a.m. and woke up at 9 to attend the wedding rehearsal at the "#4 'It' Wedding Location in New York City' per the internets with the whole family and impress them with amazing feats like forming a coherent sentence
4. You realize that it's Good Friday today and have to face the nauseating prospect of a meatless dinner at a Spanish restaurant in NEWARK, NEW JERSEY later on
5. You have a temporary tattoo that reads "Blow for a Buck" on your left tit and no amount of scrubbing will get it off
6. Your parting shot to MillerTime, after begging her for dogwalking services, while leaving for the D train is, "I don't care how trashy I look. I'm from Puyallup, goddammit."
LL Cool Jew's bachelorette party, in other words, was a success.
2. You're still drunk on Gray Goose (upon which, last night, I was slizzing) and Sugarfree Red Bulls that were consumed in gallon quantities just six short hours before
3. You went to bed at 5 a.m. and woke up at 9 to attend the wedding rehearsal at the "#4 'It' Wedding Location in New York City' per the internets with the whole family and impress them with amazing feats like forming a coherent sentence
4. You realize that it's Good Friday today and have to face the nauseating prospect of a meatless dinner at a Spanish restaurant in NEWARK, NEW JERSEY later on
5. You have a temporary tattoo that reads "Blow for a Buck" on your left tit and no amount of scrubbing will get it off
6. Your parting shot to MillerTime, after begging her for dogwalking services, while leaving for the D train is, "I don't care how trashy I look. I'm from Puyallup, goddammit."
LL Cool Jew's bachelorette party, in other words, was a success.
Labels: alcoholism, holy fucking matrimony, LL Cool Jew, MillerTime, ridiculous absurdity
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Don't you mean " Grey Goose"? No true alcoholic would misspell the best vodka in the world. Ha-ha, Benzo.
# posted by 
: 4/10/2007 6:38 PM
: 4/10/2007 6:38 PM
Your journal entries are a fucking BORE!!!! Get off your high fucking horse, you bitch!!!!
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# posted by : 4/10/2007 10:43 PM
: 4/10/2007 10:43 PM 
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