Friday, July 27, 2007
My secret identity
A while ago, KatieScarlett and I made a fake Friendster profile, "tugirlzhugging", expressly for the purpose of luring creeps out of the e-woodwork to make fun of on our blogs. Well, on my blog anyway...KatieScarlett's blog is more about photography and BloodyTosser's domination in the Muay Thai kickboxing ring. Anyway, I was just having a Google chat with KatieScarlett in our typical "To Catch a Predator" parlance (which I don't think either of us will ever get tired of) when I decided to let slip that I made a similar profile on MySpace exclusively for fucking with dumb people:
razzy: r we getting tewgether tewmorrow for brews?
katiescarlett: YAH!
razzy: SEWPER KEWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *<(;-D
katiescarlett: (((*BB!@WWK<><><>::
katiescarlett: that's a jellyfish
katiescarlett: KEWL!
razzy: I love the jellyfish!
katiescarlett: ( * ) ttha't a cat butt
razzy: ^`>********
razzy: That's a ewnikorn!
katiescarlett: YES!
katiescarlett: he's kewl!
katiescarlett: i like ewnikorns! do you ever go all the way like with a guy?
katiescarlett: i can send you some pics ;)
razzy: tottaly dewd i take it up the but!
katiescarlett: keeeeewwwl!
razzy: kewl lets get nekkid on r webcams!
katiescarlett: i'm coming over
katiescarlett: an' listen ot the stank!
razzy: i think u mean "cumming" over dewd!~;p
katiescarlett: sorry :P
razzy: dewd i've got my stank CD playing now!
razzy: btw, have u seen my myspace?
katiescarlett: im onna look now!
katiescarlett: ewe are kewt wi' nice bewbies!
razzy: actually dewd i meant my other myspace:
katiescarlett: oh
katiescarlett: i got carried away
razzy: http://www.myspace.com/darkangelzdare
katiescarlett: :)
katiescarlett: oh my god!
katiescarlett: did you make that up?
razzy: that's my secret myspace i use for fucking with people
katiescarlett: you are a genius
razzy: i got the pictures by googling "dumb emo bitches"
katiescarlett: specatacular!
razzy: it's not tugirlzhugging but we'll dew that myspace profile one of these days
katiescarlett: hoo is that girl?
razzy: i have no idea
razzy: but i get so many messages being like "ur so hott, ur so prity"
katiescarlett: i am astounded by your brilliance!
katiescarlett: did you make up that tag?
razzy: it's the natural progression of watching too much to catch a predator
katiescarlett: GAODDAMNIT!
katiescarlett: BRILLIANT
katiescarlett: WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THIS SHIT
razzy: i have no idea
razzy: i think deep down inside i'm a retarded tween with a hot topic fetish
katiescarlett: incredible
Since KatieScarlett though it was so funny, I thought I would reveal the secret of my MySpace alter ego. Besides, all the dumbasses who I plan to eventually make fun of are probably NOT under any cirucmstances reading this blog, so it's doubtful they'll come across this and realize they've been duped.
To answer KatieScarlett's question about where I come up with this shit, though, it's a simple process that goes as follows:
1. Set up a MySpace account and pick the stupidest URL imaginable for your profile.
2. Google "stupid (blank) bitches" and see what images pop up. Pick several to round out your photo section. They don't even have to be the same people...most of MySpace is very stupid and will not realize it.
3. Pick a horrible band or singer to idolize (in the case of "tugirlzhugging", this is Hoobastank, and for "darkangelzdare" it's Avril Lavigne), and MySpace befriend them, along with other related horrible bands. Thank them all for the adds and watch the idiot friend requests pile up. It also helps if you make a customized MySpace profile with the horrible band's marketing material all over it.
4. Write and spell everything exactly the opposite way that you normally world. If you cringe as you write it (ie: "I Think she's (Avril Lavigne) a great writer and so talented and never takes any bs pardon my strong language lolz!", replacing "people" with "Ppl", etc.), then it's moron-attracting gold.
5. Always say you love The Notebook. For some reason, everybody on MySpace says they love the fucking Notebook, a romantic non-comedy that I would rather stick a carving fork in my vagina than watch.
6. Sit back and wait for the fun to begin! I have more asinine messages in Dark Angel's MySpace inbox than I know what to do with.
So, you can all eagerly anticipate the many, many entries to come making fun of the tools who are propositioning Dark Angel. Just don't tell anyone that she's my secret identity...keep it on the hush.
razzy: r we getting tewgether tewmorrow for brews?
katiescarlett: YAH!
razzy: SEWPER KEWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *<(;-D
katiescarlett: (((*BB!@WWK<><><>::
katiescarlett: that's a jellyfish
katiescarlett: KEWL!
razzy: I love the jellyfish!
katiescarlett: ( * ) ttha't a cat butt
razzy: ^`>********
razzy: That's a ewnikorn!
katiescarlett: YES!
katiescarlett: he's kewl!
katiescarlett: i like ewnikorns! do you ever go all the way like with a guy?
katiescarlett: i can send you some pics ;)
razzy: tottaly dewd i take it up the but!
katiescarlett: keeeeewwwl!
razzy: kewl lets get nekkid on r webcams!
katiescarlett: i'm coming over
katiescarlett: an' listen ot the stank!
razzy: i think u mean "cumming" over dewd!~;p
katiescarlett: sorry :P
razzy: dewd i've got my stank CD playing now!
razzy: btw, have u seen my myspace?
katiescarlett: im onna look now!
katiescarlett: ewe are kewt wi' nice bewbies!
razzy: actually dewd i meant my other myspace:
katiescarlett: oh
katiescarlett: i got carried away
razzy: http://www.myspace.com/darkangelzdare
katiescarlett: :)
katiescarlett: oh my god!
katiescarlett: did you make that up?
razzy: that's my secret myspace i use for fucking with people
katiescarlett: you are a genius
razzy: i got the pictures by googling "dumb emo bitches"
katiescarlett: specatacular!
razzy: it's not tugirlzhugging but we'll dew that myspace profile one of these days
katiescarlett: hoo is that girl?
razzy: i have no idea
razzy: but i get so many messages being like "ur so hott, ur so prity"
katiescarlett: i am astounded by your brilliance!
katiescarlett: did you make up that tag?
razzy: it's the natural progression of watching too much to catch a predator
katiescarlett: GAODDAMNIT!
katiescarlett: BRILLIANT
katiescarlett: WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THIS SHIT
razzy: i have no idea
razzy: i think deep down inside i'm a retarded tween with a hot topic fetish
katiescarlett: incredible
Since KatieScarlett though it was so funny, I thought I would reveal the secret of my MySpace alter ego. Besides, all the dumbasses who I plan to eventually make fun of are probably NOT under any cirucmstances reading this blog, so it's doubtful they'll come across this and realize they've been duped.
To answer KatieScarlett's question about where I come up with this shit, though, it's a simple process that goes as follows:
1. Set up a MySpace account and pick the stupidest URL imaginable for your profile.
2. Google "stupid (blank) bitches" and see what images pop up. Pick several to round out your photo section. They don't even have to be the same people...most of MySpace is very stupid and will not realize it.
3. Pick a horrible band or singer to idolize (in the case of "tugirlzhugging", this is Hoobastank, and for "darkangelzdare" it's Avril Lavigne), and MySpace befriend them, along with other related horrible bands. Thank them all for the adds and watch the idiot friend requests pile up. It also helps if you make a customized MySpace profile with the horrible band's marketing material all over it.
4. Write and spell everything exactly the opposite way that you normally world. If you cringe as you write it (ie: "I Think she's (Avril Lavigne) a great writer and so talented and never takes any bs pardon my strong language lolz!", replacing "people" with "Ppl", etc.), then it's moron-attracting gold.
5. Always say you love The Notebook. For some reason, everybody on MySpace says they love the fucking Notebook, a romantic non-comedy that I would rather stick a carving fork in my vagina than watch.
6. Sit back and wait for the fun to begin! I have more asinine messages in Dark Angel's MySpace inbox than I know what to do with.
So, you can all eagerly anticipate the many, many entries to come making fun of the tools who are propositioning Dark Angel. Just don't tell anyone that she's my secret identity...keep it on the hush.
Labels: internet domination, KatieScarlett, kewlness, MySpace, ridiculous absurdity
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Too damn brilliant!
I almost feel sorry for the twits.
btw I googled "dumb emo bitches"
without quotes and got this guy on page two. i77.photobucket.com/albums/j50/razzyorg/gross.jpg
hehe.
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I almost feel sorry for the twits.
btw I googled "dumb emo bitches"
without quotes and got this guy on page two. i77.photobucket.com/albums/j50/razzyorg/gross.jpg
hehe.
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