Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Daily Dude I Want to Hit: Angelique from "Rock of Love 2" AGAIN
DOB: ????
Occupation: suitor of Bret Michaels, reality whore, would-be porn star
Hometown: France?
Current residence: Los Angeles, California
Why I Want to Hit that Hotness: I must have some great porn star-dar when it comes to figuring out which of Bret Michaels's prospective girlfriends has fucked on camera before. Last season I was all about "Amateur Facial" alumna Brandi M., and now the internets tell me that my current favorite Vh1 trainwreck ho is indeed currently looking for work. Yes, Angelique, the beat down French chick who came out the gate discussing her desire to "have some zex wis Bret in zis pool" and her multiple breast augmentations is in the market for a gig in porn. She's more than happy to do "Hardcore, Boy/Girl, Print, Interracial, Boy/girl/girl, Fetish, Bondage, (No Anal ), Fetish, Solo with Toys, Girl/Girl/Girl, Blow Jobs, Boy/Boy/girl," per her website anyway (and being that this is a porn "talent agency" website, I think it's implicit that the shit is NSFW). What's with the "no anal" clause? I would think that if you're down to get gangbanged, a little garden variety sodomy would be no problem for a slag like Angelique.
And what is with Angelique's insane lips? I think the collagen factory had to put their shit on backorder once she left her surgeon's strip mall storefront, because she cleaned out their entire supply. She looks like she should be jauntily rocking a sailor hat and quacking in rage at Huey, Dewey, and Louie, not marketing her herpetic snatch to the editors of Swank and the omega-list porn webcam circuit. She looks trashy even for a low-rent porn hooker (albeit a classy, front entry-only one).
That said, she is my favorite "Rock of Love" girl. Bret Michaels was smart to keep her around for another week. He should keep her around at least until she can have some zex wis him in zis pool, because that would be interesting, and that's much better for Bret's career than actually finding some boring broad with a couple tattoos and falling in love. Well, by "interesting" I mean gross, but at least in the presumably chlorinated pool Bret would probably have some measure of protection from the vermin representing Phylum Arthropoda that I suspect are crawling all over Angelique's nether regions. It would entertain!
Labels: Daily Dude I Want to Hit, porn, Rock of Love, sluts, Vh1
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That bitch is fucking gross. That whole show is the dog pound this season, and that is what that pussy Poison boy gets, because what kind of rock star has to have a TV show to get pussy anyway?
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