Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Like Tupac said...
...you need a Pug in your life. Okay, maybe Tupac actually said "thug" instead of "Pug," but since Chingy! crawled up next to me and started snoring louder than the unmuffled Husqvarna chainsaw that spent several years during my childhood as my father's favorite power tool, I figured that he was being his usual attention-whore self and wanted me to take his picture with my MacBook webcam.
Apparently some people think this disgusting creature is cute. Okay, just MAYBE I think Chingy! is okay sometimes, and just maybe every once in a while he does something touching that makes me pet him and croon sweet CHONGAY CHONGs into his rank, tarry little ears, and just maybe I'd be devastated if anything ever happened to him, so I guess I can humor his request to show off his ugly mug here on this blog for the amusement of all you Chingy!philes out there.
Besides, Chingy! is in a posing mood, and it's probably because a new cycle of "America's Next Top Model" premieres tonight. I think ANTM exhausted its supply of potential top models long ago, because Chingy! is frankly better looking than 90% of the girls they've casted on the last few cycles. Now that I think of it, it would be awesome if Chingy! wound up on ANTM. I'd love to watch him leave anus prints all over the judging runway and sneeze contemptuously at Tyra while she instructs him on the finer points of "smiling with his eyes" and being "so wrong he's right." Besides, they always need a plus-sized model on there to prompt a few discussions with Tyra about maintaining a healthy body image, and I have no doubt that Chingy! is sufficiently portly to fall squarely in the Lane Bryant category. In fact, they could even replace Tyra's annoying ass with Chingy! The show would probably score record ratings, and if anyone knows how to displace sentiments of disgust and revulsion with a disarmingly photogenic ability to work the camera, it's Chingy!.
CHONGAY CHONG, Top Model!
Besides, Chingy! is in a posing mood, and it's probably because a new cycle of "America's Next Top Model" premieres tonight. I think ANTM exhausted its supply of potential top models long ago, because Chingy! is frankly better looking than 90% of the girls they've casted on the last few cycles. Now that I think of it, it would be awesome if Chingy! wound up on ANTM. I'd love to watch him leave anus prints all over the judging runway and sneeze contemptuously at Tyra while she instructs him on the finer points of "smiling with his eyes" and being "so wrong he's right." Besides, they always need a plus-sized model on there to prompt a few discussions with Tyra about maintaining a healthy body image, and I have no doubt that Chingy! is sufficiently portly to fall squarely in the Lane Bryant category. In fact, they could even replace Tyra's annoying ass with Chingy! The show would probably score record ratings, and if anyone knows how to displace sentiments of disgust and revulsion with a disarmingly photogenic ability to work the camera, it's Chingy!.
Labels: America's Next Top Model, CHONGAY CHONG, doggity style, gross, media whores
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