Thursday, March 06, 2008
Daily Douchebag: pancreatic cancer
DOB: N/A
Occupation: metastasis, killing people
Hometown: N/A
Current residence: Patrick Swayze's pancreas, bile ducts, and lymphatic system
Douchebaggery: I'm sorry, I just can't get over this Patrick Swayze cancer news. The possibility that the Swayzmeister might be done in by his gallbladder-obstructing, metastasizing adenocarcinomas fills me with anxiety, dread, and despair. I don't think I really need to say much to reiterate that pancreatic cancer sucks or convince everyone that a pancreatic tumor is at the very least a monumental douchebag. However, I think pancreatic cancer's already loathsome reputation got worse now that it's going to deprive us of the genius that is Patrick Swayze. Pancreatic cancer is on par with the bullet that killed Kennedy, the made-up weapons of mass destruction that were supposedly in Iraq, and Kate Hudson's entire career in terms of sheer, unadulterated douchebaggery. Don't take my Swayze from me! Don't take him!
Labels: assholes, Daily Douchebag, science
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