Friday, June 06, 2008
Columbia University Medical Center: where we put the "class" in grad school
Today one of my esteemed colleagues went to use the bathroom in the building where I work, and found this:
It seems that either one of the burgeoning yeast geneticists on her floor has picked up some of Dylan McKay's bad habits (and sheesh, you guys, I know grad school sucks but heroin is not the answer...booze is), or after hours our building full of science nerds is a haven for junkies. Considering that campus safety around here sucks so bad that my labmate SisterChristian once caught a Columbia rent-a-cop stealing from the kitchen on our floor, I wouldn't be surprised if the unsavory sorts that hang around the Columbia-Presbyterian hospital ER were allowed to come shoot up in the Hammer building ninth floor ladies room. But sheesh, the least they can do is chuck their dirty paraphernalia in one of the sharps containers that are ubiquitous in a building full of biomedical research labs.
What I am most curious about is what the dropper was for. I mean, okay, the syringe is clearly forinjecting drugs (or I guess it could possibly be for insulin, too). What the hell purpose does the dropper serve, though? The only thing I can think of is dripping water into your spoon to cook up your drugs with (that's how drugs are cooked up, right? I think I've seen people do that on episodes of "Intervention"). The only other illicit use I can think of is dripping laudanum tincture into a glass of water like that rich widow on "Deadwood," but since I haven't heard of anyone being addicted to laudanum anytime this century, somehow I doubt that was what it was used for.
As always, Columbia is everything one would expect a fine, fancy, Ivy League institution to be. We not only get paid the shittiest stipend of all the reputable New York City grad schools, have the worst housing, and boast the lowest morale among grad students in the biomedical sciences, we can at least brag that our research building bathrooms are cozy places for local indigent junkies to inject their probably HIV- and hepC-positive asses with illegal opiates. I hope I never graduate, because I just love the elegant, sophisticated, incredibly respectable atmosphere here at Columbia so fucking much. I never want to leave.
Labels: crime and punishment, drugs, fuck Columbia, grad school bullshit
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